AZ Central - A 53-year-old Chandler woman was arrested late Sunday on suspicion of threatening to kill her husband after she told police that they “stopped having sex.”  At about 11:12 p.m., Gloria Pratt reportedly called police on her husband of two years at their home in Chandler because she said she was upset.  Upon arriving, officers observed that Pratt was intoxicated, was told about the no-sex and determined that no crime had been committed by either Pratt or her husband.  Police said they wished them luck and left the home.  One minute later, officers saw Pratt through a living room window of their home yelling at her husband to “do something” while he was laying on a couch.  She then reportedly yelled, “I’m going to kill you,” before walking toward the kitchen.  The officers knocked on the front door and detained Pratt at about 11:32 p.m.

 

Every time we get a story like this the comments are always the same.  What a pussy this guy is!   He didn’t want to have sex?!  What a gay!  Revoke his man card!   Turn in your penis dude!  Comments from people who have obviously never been in a long term relationship.  I mean we’re not talking about a college couple here with infinity libido.  Not talking about a couple of 20 somethings with all their youth and sexual virility.    Motherfuckers are in their 50s.  Dude is just lying on the couch with his feet up trying to watch Seinfeld reruns on Pix 11 desperately trying to avoid getting nagged by his bitch wife so he can relax for once.  Probably praying to God she tires herself out and passes out early so he can quietly sneak off to the guest bathroom with his iPad and a bottle of lube and pretend he’s doing doggy style with Abella Anderson instead of missionary with his ugly wife.  You know, what I’d imagine every middle aged husband does.

Listen I sympathize with this lady solely because of the fact that she was hammered drunk.  I really do.  Sometimes you get boozed up and horny and just need to get slammed between the sheets and when you get turned down it’s a night ruiner.  Might even break down and call the cops to try and force your husband to at least go down on you for 10 minutes or something.   But the bottom line is you just can’t go around threatening to kill every husband who doesn’t want to rail you  because frankly sometimes they’re just plain tired, either physically, or mentally of you.