Philly – A Philadelphia woman was hiding 36 vials of crack in her vagina when she and her boyfriend were busted for trying to sell the drug at an Upper Darby Wawa on Saturday, police said. Shortly before 5 a.m., a man in his 40s from Sicklerville, N.J., was at the Wawa on 69th Street near Patterson Avenue when he tried to buy crack from Marcus Gibson, 23, and his girlfriend, Ashley Bellamy, 22, who were in a black GMC Yukon, said Upper Darby Police Superintendent Michael Chitwood. When police showed up and removed Bellamy from the car, they noticed she was “walking funny,” as if she was carrying something between her legs, Chitwood said. A female officer was called to the scene to conduct a search, but before she could, Bellamy admitted she was hiding something. “The woman says, ‘I have crack up in my vagina,’ and she pushed out 36 vials of crack cocaine that were in a bag,” Chitwood said.Gibson said that the drugs were his and that he had asked his girlfriend to conceal them when cops arrived, police said. “It’s true love in the ‘hood,” Chitwood said. “Thank God the lady didn’t have a snake or a crocodile, or we’d really have been in trouble.”
Vaginas are so confusing. Cue the kmarko you’re such a virgin, I bet you’ve never even seen one you loser blogger, I crush so much pussy I’m basically a vagina expert. Whatever, grow up. Still don’t get it. Like you can just stick 36 vials in there? And they just sit there? Where do they go? Do they not migrate up into your stomach? They’re just hanging out in the vaginal area until you’re ready to push them out one by one? It’s fascinating really. I’ll have to check up on it. Really comes in handy for being a criminal too, whether it be thief or drug dealer. Just a constant hidden storage cache that is apparently infinity deep and that no male cop would ever willingly check. I mean if this bitch didn’t blabber to the cops immediately that she had crack up in her vagina she’d be free and clear to just post bail and resume slinging her vagina juice crack around Philly. Really screwed the pooch on that one.
PS – Nice joke Chitwood. Wompp womp.