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Longhorns Get Owned In “Texas Football is Back” 2013 Trailer Spoof

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May 204:50PM EST

Original Video:

“In Your Face You Longhorn Pussies” Video:

 

Boom! Texas getting southern style BBQ’d. To be honest, I thought the first video was embarrassing enough. Probably didn’t even need to pile on. When your 2013 preview is just Mack Brown basically apologizing for falling asleep at the wheel since 2009, you don’t exactly have A-1 hype up material.

EDC New York Sets

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May 204:10PM EST

Festival season brings festival sets, and today we’ve got EDC New York performance recordings from Afrojack, Porter Robinson, Nicky Romero and more…

Rate This Bro’s “Dream School” Music Video He Made To Get Off Wait List At U. Chicago

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May 203:30PM EST

I made this video in a desperate attempt to be accepted from the wait list at the University of Chicago. Let’s hope it works!

 

 

As much as I hate college employees I got to say, I respect the shit out of the U Chicago admissions department for not letting this squid in to their school.  Seriously thanks for the video and the effort you put into it pal but if you don’t mind we’re going to continue letting people into our school based on like, their qualifications and shit, as opposed to their homemade music videos, if you don’t mind.

 

 

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (32 votes, average: 1.50 out of 5)
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Georgia Tech Straight Killing The Meme Recruiting Game

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May 202:50PM EST

SB Nation- There is the Florida coaching staff, which is attempting to redefine the entire medium with a series of horrendous MS Paint-style photo edits complete with hashtags. Wyoming has joined in. Oregon State is in the mix. Then there is Georgia Tech. Specifically, Yellow Jackets offensive graduate assistant Preston Pehrson, who joined Twitter on January 30, mostly to troll snowed-in Northerners: That hashtag eventually morphed into something called “The Migration,” an attempt to lure recruits from the mid-Atlantic, upper Midwest and Northeast to Atlanta. Remember how Ed Orgeron told his Ole Miss staff that their planes did not fly north? Georgia Tech’s apparently go out of the nation’s most fertile recruiting ground to farm the snow-packed states.If it had remained Pehrson reminding potential Georgia Tech recruits that Southern cities have warmer weather than Northern cities, it would have remained annoying but innocuous. That, of course, was not good enough for Pehrson. He inevitably turned to that hot new recruiting tactic: Photoshopping.

Mark my words: 50 years from now people are going to look back at 2013 as the year that redefined the recruiting game. Mississippi State and NC State finally gave the ballers of the country the love they deserve, Rutgers basically stopped trying and it was still awesome, and Florida showed the world that they’re five years behind on pop culture. But I don’t know if anyone can touch @CoachPehrson. Dude is absolutely relentless. You think he cares that people might not want to go to a tech school with a 100:1 gender ratio and a Barstool intern no one has ever heard of? Fuck no. People liking nice weather + Hotlanta having nice weather=#TheMigration. Flawless execution.

Instagram straight flexin

Apparently no one has told Atlanta it’s not 2001 anyone

This exists

Coach loves him some Will Ferrel:

And perhaps his magnum opus:

#TheMigration

Commencement Speeches: Stephen Colbert at UVA and Workaholic’s Bro at Wisconsin

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May 202:10PM EST

 

 

99% of people on here have a 0% chance of watching a 17 minute video, let alone 2 on one post, but I know that last year a bunch of people ate these commencement speeches up so I figured I’d throw them up here real quick.  Colbert at UVA and Workaholic bro at Wisconsin seem to be the 2 most popular.  Not the Arizona Commencement Rave or anything but legit nonetheless.

Smokesmash Matchup From Hell – Sarah from UVM vs. Lauren from Towson

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May 201:25PM EST

 

Sarah from UVM

 

Lauren from Towson

1 for Sarah…5 for Lauren

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Classixx – All You’re Waiting For (ft. Nancy Whang)

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May 2012:40PM EST

Cali-based production duo Classixx released a new album Hanging Gardens a couple weeks back, and I’ve been addicted to the lead single ever since.  ”All You’re Waiting For” is sexy synths and feel good vibes for days, a song that once it hits your ears, you won’t be able to stop playing until summer is through.

Check out Classixx on Soundcloud for more of their filthy nu-disco sounds.

Alabama Auctions Broken BCS Championship Trophy for $105k

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Falabama-auctions-broken-2012-bcs-championship-trophy-for-105k%2F
May 2012:00PM EST


That’s some pretty solid value retention. Apparently, it doesn’t even matter that some dude smashed your trophy like Gronk spiking a TD. The thing’s still worth six figures in a billion itty bitty pieces.

I’m pretty sure crystal wasn’t the best material choice for a football trophy. Who honestly thought that was a good idea? Could they have picked something more fragile to let a bunch of beefy football dudes carry around? Might as well hand over a commemorative card house in a wind tunnel every time somebody wins a championship. A college football trophy should make it out of something indestructible. Like rebar and Nokia phones. Sure it’s not as pretty. But you could drop the thing out of a plane during the flyover every Saturday and it wouldn’t even dent.

Lax Brah 80 Yard Goal

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May 2011:30AM EST

 

Lotta emails about this one.  I think my last couple of lax posts made people think I’m a big lax fan and actually enjoy the game and know what’s going on?  Because I blogged that kid getting truck sticked times infinity I all of a sudden wear Middys and Air Max 90s and mesh tanks and walk around with my lax stick doing that little cradle move all day?  Whatever, I’ll do that, I’ll fuckin own it.  Lax fan with a capital L.

 

Duke Sends D Lineman 115 Handwritten Letters In Most Unique Recruiting Move Of All Time

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May 2010:50AM EST

ScoutWhether Nebraska is slow playing Millard West defensive lineman Harrison Phillips or they just really need to see him in camp to form an opinion, other teams are putting the pressure on him to secure a commitment – the biggest maybe being Duke.  On Saturday, Phillips posted multiple pictures of the Blue Devils efforts. The first being 115 hand written letters:  Phillips responded with “Shout out to Duke. 115 personally hand written letters. Wow.”  Minutes later, he posted another picture.

 

Oh did I say unique?  I meant literally the most played out move in the recruiting game right now.   I mean I’m just not sure it’s physically possible to be more annoying than to clog a guy’s mailbox with 115 handwritten fucking letters.    Bring him to campus, tell him he’ll start, then set him up with 2 sluts to threesome the shit out of him after a campus party.  How hard is that?