Smoke Smash Entry Form

*First Name:
*Last Name:
Last name is just to facebook girl for permission.
*Photo:
Upload File
*School: Facebook URL:

USC Phi Sigma Kappa’s “Masquerave” Is Yet Another Party That Makes Me Hate My Life

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fusc-phi-sigma-kappas-masquerave-is-yet-another-party-that-makes-me-hate-my-life%2F
Dec 183:45PM EST

 

 

 

Oh cool, another college party that makes me want to die!  Keep up the good work tipsters, it’s definitely not catastrophically depressing!

 

Still can’t get over that last fucking USC party

 

ElegantDarkJumpingbean

 

Are all you USC people like professional partiers slash videographers?

 

 

 

 

 

h/t Taylor (fuck you Taylor) via R/Frat 

 

Chicks Confess What Life Is Like With Huge Boobs

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fchicks-confess-what-life-is-like-with-huge-boobs%2F
Dec 183:00PM EST
I have no problem when guys only want to date me for my huge boobs. I love them & so should they

 

I genuinely love that my boobs are so big they will never fully fit in any bra, no matter how big it is

 

Whenever people meet me, they don't remember my name, instead they call me "the girl with the big boobs" I don't hate it

 

I got pulled over today but Got away with no  ticket after squeezing my boobs together and letting the cop motorboat me

 

I use my boobs to get my way and I feel guilty and good about it at the same time

 

I never wear bras. My nipples are pierced and I'm a size DD/DDD. They're just so uncomfortable. I like my boobs to feel free.

 

I tell people I hate having big boobs but I secretly love all the attention they get me

 

Just found out I can lick my own nipples. ...YES!!! love having big boobs

 

my boobs are so big that I can't help but flash my boyfriend at random and it turns him on so fast.

 

I can't see my toes anymore, not because I'm fat but because my boobs are too big

 

I love having big boobs. They give my chin a pillow to rest on when I fall asleep at my desk at work.

 

I wear a D cup and if you think that I don't play with my boobs, you're wrong.

 

I don't think he could handle my boobs. There isn't a second date

 

My boobs are so big I can't bend over because it puts too much pressure on my nips

 

I'm scared of losing weight because I don't want my big boobs to get smaller.

 

I've always wanted to work at Hooters. I have the boobs for it so why not?

 

I have huge boobs. I win as a woman.

 

 

 

 

What’s it like to have huge boobs? Awesome.  I answered it for you girls.  Just in a word that sums it up. Good looking chick with big boobs, the world is your oyster. Can get literally anything you want.  Don’t want to hear any sob stories about it.

 

To check out more confessions or leave your own check out the Whisper App now…

 

 

 

thenug-nfCqLv7ctc

Smokesmash Matchup from Hell – Peyton from TCU vs. Avery from Syracuse

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fsmokesmash-matchup-from-hell-peyton-from-tcu-vs-avery-from-syracuse%2F
Dec 182:20PM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 12.19.53 PM

 

 

 

 

Peyton from TCU

 

Screen-Shot-2014-08-19-at-3.07.14-PM Screen-Shot-2014-08-19-at-3.08.09-PM Screen-Shot-2014-08-19-at-3.07.22-PM Screen-Shot-2014-08-19-at-3.08.19-PM Screen-Shot-2014-08-19-at-3.07.44-PM

 

 

Avery from Syracuse

 

67568_10151583890157238_1116702839_n

Screen-Shot-2013-08-14-at-9.29.52-AM

Screen-Shot-2013-08-14-at-9.32.00-AM

Screen-Shot-2013-08-14-at-9.32.48-AM

Screen-Shot-2013-08-14-at-9.33.35-AM

 

 

 

1 for Peyton..5 for Avery

 

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (182 votes, average: 4.11 out of 5)
Loading ... Loading ...

Get Rich For The Holidays With The DraftKings $400K Flea Flicker Championship

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fget-rich-for-the-holidays-with-the-draftkings-400k-flea-flicker-championship%2F
Dec 182:00PM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 2.03.50 PM

 

 

 

SIGN UP HERE

 

Getting depressed thinking about the end of the football season.  Only one way to send it out with a bang – winning $50K in the DraftKings Flea Flicker championship this weekend.  Pay for all my Christmas presents and doorman tips.

$5 entry gives you a shot at $400K in cash prizes, 50K to first place.  Top 18,995 scores cash.  Just pick your lineup for the weekend games and you’re done.  It’s simple.

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 11.40.21 AM

 

 

Contest Details:

-NFL $400K Flea Flicker Championship
-This is the biggest $5 entry fee league of the entire football season
-$400,000 in prize money, $50,000 to 1st place
-Top 18,995 fantasy scores win cash, with the chance to turn a $5 entry into $50K

 

ALSO - 

Draft Kings is doing a league supporting Pete’s Plunge and raising money for ALS. Its called the “NFL $1K For Pete Frates Fund (ALS Research).” The way it works is that it’s a $10 entry, and all entry fees will be donated. DraftKings will pay out $1,000 in cash to 1st place, and some DraftKings swag to the rest of the top 10. There are unlimited entries allowed so they are hoping to raise some good money for the cause.

 

SIGN UP FOR PETE FRATES FUND CONTEST

Clemson Football Sends Recruits Letters from Santa Claus

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fclemson-football-sends-recruits-letters-from-santa-claus%2F
Dec 181:20PM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 10.59.06 AM

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 10.58.59 AM

 

 

 

Haha, God I love Dabo.  Not just a great coach but also a recruiting genius.  Clemson Football about to scoop up every 3-8 year old talent in the god damn nation.  Just so long as they mind their manners and get all their chores done, the Tigers don’t need anybody from the naughty list messing up their locker room chemistry.

 

2025 National Championship.  Cue the music!

 

 

 

 

PS – Oh come on guys.

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 10.59.40 AM

 

 

Supposed to be a magical reindeer, sounds like an officer in the German army or something.

 

Vanic x K.Flay – Make Me Fade

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fvanic-x-k-flay-make-me-fade%2F
Dec 1812:40PM EST

Been seeing this song everywhere, finally gave in and listened, and holy shit is it hot.  And it’s a free download, come see me.

Problems We Can’t Relate To…2017 Hoops Recruit Knocks Himself Out Hitting Head On Backboard

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fproblems-we-cant-relate-to-2017-hoops-recruit-knocks-himself-out-hitting-head-on-backboard%2F
Dec 1812:00PM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 11.14.20 AM

 

 

 

Fucking hate when that happens.  When I’m playing men’s league pickup and smash my face on the backboard going up for a block with my 46 inch vertical.   The 45 year old guys with Horace Grant goggles and 6 knee braces on always make so much fun of me for it.

 

Kid looks pretty good though.  Offers from Zona and Georgetown, ever heard of them?

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 11.29.27 AM

 

 

 

h/t Lost Letterman

Does This Look Like The Face Of A Kid Named Bud Weisser Facing 7 Years In Prison For Breaking Into A Gas Station

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fdoes-this-look-like-the-face-of-a-kid-named-bud-weisser-facing-7-years-in-prison-for-breaking-into-a-gas-station%2F
Dec 1811:30AM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 10.25.42 PM

 

 

 

FOX - A teen with a unique name turned himself in after making a run from the law.

Police say Bud Weisser, 18, snuck into the Exxon gas station in the 900 block of Lemay Ferry road at 4:30am. An officer on patrol saw a man climbing out of a shattered window in the convenience store. Police say they chased the suspect but he escaped.

A statement from St. Louis County Police states that investigators found evidence that linked Bud Weisser to the burglary. He turned himself in a few days later and submitted to a swab for DNA. The blood on the counter of the convenience store matched the DNA taken from Weisser.

 

 

#UpForWhatever

 

Be more St. Louis than having the name Bud Weisser and getting arrested for robbing a gas station convenience store.  You can’t.  Have a worse Justin Bieber haircut.  You can’t.  It’s like this kid was created in a laboratory as a living breathing stereotype designed specifically for me to hate.   Ridiculous name, stealing from people and Bieber hair… basically a walking embodiment of everything that’s wrong with the youth of America.

5 Year Old Little Bro Sends UAB Cash Money To Save Their Football Program

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2F5-year-old-little-bro-sends-uab-cash-money-to-save-their-football-program%2F
Dec 1810:55AM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 9.30.49 AM

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 9.31.01 AM

Screen Shot 2014-12-18 at 9.31.36 AM

 

 

 

Love this little guy.  Back when I was his age and I would get my weekly allowance I would sprint straight up to my room to hide that shit in a shoebox, hoard all my dollar bills and quarters together so I could go on the best candy and soda shopping spree ever.  This kid sticks it in an envelope and sends it to a school to try and save their entire football program.  Not even his favorite team, just wants those guys to have as much fun as his Buckeyes do.  Heart of gold.  Don’t ever change kid, don’t ever change.

 

Unfortunately I get the feeling UAB President Ebeneezer Scrooge immediately ripped it in half and set it on fire to light his cigar in his office as he counts all the cash he’s saving by not giving it to the football team.

 

 

The $11,000 Per Year Seamless Addict Girl Cyberbullied Me On Twitter Because I Tindered With Her Years Ago

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fthe-11000-per-year-seamless-addict-girl-cyberbullied-me-on-twitter-because-i-tindered-with-her-years-ago%2F
Dec 1810:04AM EST

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.10.20 PM

 

 

KFC blogged about a young lady yesterday who was featured in the NY Post for her Seamless “addiction” that entails her spending $11,000 per year on food delivery from Seamless. The story was everywhere, including on BroBible, a site in which I know most of the guys since we worked for the same parent company for a year. Before KFC’s blog I saw theirs, replied saying I had Tindered with the girl in the article a while back and ultimately didn’t go out with her because she lived/worked in a land far away in Connecticut while I lived in NYC (though her location did indicate NYC…needless to say it’s a Tinder faux pas because most people aren’t traveling for such things). I also may have mentioned her obviously ample breasts because honestly it’s relevant to the conversation, like maybe you add a 10 mile radius per cup size, I don’t know what the rules are.

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 8.52.27 PM

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 8.52.57 PM

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 8.55.44 PM

 

 

Totally innocuous social media conversation with the Valley to Barstool’s Bayside. Fast forward hours later and I notice a bunch of mentions and a follow from a familiar face.

 

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 8.58.57 PM

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.00.39 PM

 

Obviously a bit of a shock when someone finds you talking something resembling trash about them but I guess you shouldn’t be surprised when people who willingly participate in news articles about how much sushi they order also search for anything mentioning them.

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.03.25 PM

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.07.25 PM

You’d think I would have learned about the danger of not @ing someone on Twitter when my boss was murdered in the street like one of Bruce Wayne’s parents a mere week ago but apparently not.

 

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.14.55 PM

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.16.12 PM

I’m correct. It’s a breach of etiquette to act like you’re in NYC and then ask me to drive (I don’t have or need a car) or take a train or bus like a poor person just for the opportunity to buy you a vodka soda and hopefully slip in an appendage or two. And you can tell I’m correct because at this point, it seemed like it became less about my mentioning Tindering with her, or her location, or the ampleness of her titties and more about guy sites objectifying women?

 

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 9.15.40 PM

 

And she’s right. Strong powerful women who give interviews about spending Haiti’s GDP on diner kale and have bios touting their appearance on a gimmicky Bravo dating show weeks before it’s even aired and chat up 30 Tinder dudes a day deserve to be treated better. They’re to be revered, not rated, because they’re not seeking our attention or validation for themselves or their sweet titties. So instead of me picking a fight on Twitter (Spags fighting on Twitter and Tinder in one blog…drink) let’s celebrate her with some photos from her Instagram and wish her all the luck in the world in the respectful and dignified world of seeking love on reality TV.

 

 

 

 

…playas fuck up.