TMZ- Eva Longoria had an interesting Wednesday night … she GRADUATED from a master’s program at Cal State University Northridge. First off … this was NO honorary degree — 38-year-old Eva quietly busted her ass for the past 3 years (taking classes IN PERSON) to earn a master’s degree in Chicano and Chicana Studies from CSUN. A rep for Longoria tells us … Eva began the program while she was still working on “Desperate Housewives” and found time to complete her schoolwork on the set. We’re told Eva’s thesis was titled, “Success STEMS From Diversity: The Value of Latinas in STEM Careers.
Is Eva kidding me right now? My graduation photos are all of me in sunglasses trying to find the right angle to hide the bloating after abusing my body for four years. No smiles, a fucked up hood and a triangle-shaped sunburn on my head. Absolute trainwreck. After seeing these pictures I almost want to follow in her footsteps and gets a masters in Chicano and Chicano Studies too, and by that I mean I want to spend the next two years touching myself to pictures of Eva Longoria.
PS- We also need to take a second to recognize Mr. Longoria for his phenomenal sperm and the ability rock a bolo tie like no one else before him. That’s high fashion.