USA Today – The Bright Complex, the home of the Aggies football program, is undergoing a massive renovation that in total, is a $20.8 million project. The team areas alone, which include the locker rooms, hallways, meeting rooms, sports medicine facility and hydrotherapy pool for example, cost $16.8 million. This is in addition to the Kyle Field renovations, a $450 million campaign that is expected to be completed in 2015.
Some cool features include a private barbershop (something that seems to be all the rage in new football facilities these days), HDTVs mounted inside the walls around the hydrotherapy pool, and LED screens above each locker that displays information about that particular player.
The locker room is obviously cool as fuck, there’s no way around that. If I were a 17-year-old kid visiting colleges and saw something like this that looks like a cross between a locker room, the Playboy Mansion, and anywhere anyone’s ever done molly, I’d sign on the dotted line immediately. It could use more robot butlers or even an actual in-house barber to do the hair cuts, but it’s still insanely impressive, high tech, and needlessly garish in the way our modern day Roman gladiators deserve.
That said, things like this make the NCAA look even more like an absolute joke. Yeah sure, guys, we just paid for an upgrade that costs more than the GDP of 40% of the countries around the globe but your tuition and books are enough to carry you through your journey making this money for us. Now, assuming we’re a clean program (a lofty assumption, I’ll admit), go back to your crappy one-room apartments and eat some Oscar Meyer hot dogs for dinner if your hot plate is working. Not quite good enough to make it to the pros? Cool, hope you enjoyed not learning much, have a side of chronic traumatic encephalopathy and some Lou Gehrig’s disease to show for it. Lawsuit? What? Sorry, can’t hear you anymore now, you’re breaking up la la la.
Sweet ass LEDs, though. Bright shiny things! Perfect distraction for a corrupt system desperately in need of a controlled demolition.