Barstool U - By the C - Student, for the C - Student.

I had just started an internship and noticed my supervisor constantly bullying my co-worker in the workplace. The abuse were often physical. I confronted him about his behavior, but I felt his explanation was insincere. I fear that his appalling behavior would continue should I not be around to witness it.

Note to Pres.  Want us to blog more on weekends?   Don’t send angry emails.  Come over here and punch my face 100 times.

PS – If this is what happens to a guy who files his TPS reports late I cannot even imagine the beating this Youtube whistleblower intern is going to catch once his supervisor sees this shit viral on the internet.

Daily Mail – A college student was so scared to tell his parents he was failing English that he faked his own kidnapping.  Aftab Aslam, 19, received an F in English class at Georgia Gwinnett College and simply couldn’t bear to disappoint his family having failed the course already once before, Patch reports.  On April 27 he fled from home and texted his parents on behalf of a group of make-believe abductors.  The text said that their son had been kidnapped and warned them not to call the police or he would be killed.  The parents did, however, phone the police, who also brought in the FBI for what they said was an ‘intensive investigation’.

Several appeals were put out for the teen, who unknown to them all was camping in a tent in an open field in Forsyth County.  He returned home eight days later when the weather turned cold and wet.  Initially, he kept up the pretense saying he had been drugged and held prisoner  It appears he thought the relief of his being returned would stop his parents being angry when he eventually told them about his grades.

Not the first time we’ve had a kid fake a kidnapping to get out of trouble with his parents.  Or the second.  Or the third.  At this point basically if you have a child, and they are enrolled in school somewhere, and you get a call that they’re kidnapped and being held bound and gagged at gunpoint, there’s a 99.5% chance they just failed a final.   Don’t waste the headache with the FBI, just set up the grounding parameters, take their car keys away, and dock their allowance for 3 months in preparation for when they stumble home 7 days later.  But I’m nothing if not consistent so I’ll say the same thing I said for all the others.  Love this move, and I’ll always love it.   High risk high reward like a motherfucker.    Scared money don’t make money or in this case a bro who flunked English can’t escape getting his ass beat by a belt from his pissed off dad paying his tuition without staging an armed kidnapping and camping out in the park for a week.

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Introducing Paige from Loyola.  Sending you out to the weekend on a high note.  Have a good one!

Daft Punk weren’t the only ones releasing music this week, but they might as well have been.

Stream Daft Punk’s Random Access Memories

HuffPo- Yale University faces a fine of $165,000 from the U.S. Department of Education for “serious and numerous” Clery Act violations, including failing to report forcible sex offenses. Yale failed to report a total of four forcible sex offenses in its campus crime statistics for 2001 and 2002, according to an April 19 letter from Mary E. Gust, director of administrative actions and appeals service group at the DOE. As a result, the department is fining the university $27,500 for each offense, the letter said. The Connecticut Ivy League university also received a $27,500 fine for failing to include seven required policy statements in its annual crime reports, and another $27,500 for not including crime statistics from Yale-New Haven Hospital in its annual campus crime data. The Clery Act is a federal law requiring colleges to disclose campus crime data and issue safety alerts. Forcible sex offenses under the Clery Actinclude rape, fondling and sexual assault. Yale has since revised its policies, but the department again noted it did not excuse the Clery Act violations, and the university must pay a total of $165,000.  Under the Clery Act, the maximum fine for failing to report an on-campus crime was $27,500 in 2002. The maximum was increased to $35,000 in 2012.

Obviously no one is endorsing rape on college campuses. Or rape in general for that matter. Because that’s bad news. But Yale was basically asking for this. “Oh well we’re ranked in the Top 10 on US News and World Report. Nothing bad can happen here. What happens at the Ivies stays in the Ivies. #YOYO” I know having an endowment like Yale essentially makes you a rich white kid whose parents will bail you out of any trouble you get into, but still, have a little bit of common sense.   If Yale really wanted to get out of this they could blame literally every single crime on the fact they they decided to have a school in fucking New Haven. Someone died? New Haven. People got fondled in the quad? New Haven. A group of Native Americans stormed the Skull and Bones Society to reclaim their ancestor’s skull? New Haven. For a supposedly smart school deciding to pay $150,00 to cover this shit up is dumb as rocks.

Cougar Center- In what might be the most WSU thing in the history of WSU things, President Elson Floyd announced Thursday that the school will cancel classes on the afternoon of Thursday, Oct. 31, in advance of that night’s televised football game against Arizona State. Additionally, he said that attendance at morning classes will be at the discretion of faculty. A less cynical person would note that Pullman more or less has to change everything to accommodate the influx of people into the city when there is a football game. Floyd said this is “opportunity to share the beauty of our unique Pullman campus before a national television audience in a broadcast carried by one of the ESPN family of networks,” and that this is “part of our efforts to ensure the safety and ease of travel throughout campus for faculty, staff, students and fans,”

Elson Floyd knows what the fuck is up. State School vs. State School. The biggest party school in the nation vs. the school in Washington that no one in country can name the mascot of. But this is the kind of college president I want. When I went to BC I roomed with the nephew of the president of the school. He came to eat dinner at our room and my roommates made me take down my poster of Tori Black.This is the kind of president I need. The guy who cancels classes five months ahead of time because he has a pipe dream. That’s the confidence I want in the head of my school. WSU +23.5? For sure. But at least they get the day off.

Caitlyn from Texas State 

Kim from UDel 

1 for Caitlyn…5 for Kim

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The Weeknd croons about sex and drugs (what else?) on the first two tracks off his sophomore effort Kiss Land, due out later this year.

3 for the bad play by the center fielder, 7 for the awesome front flip, evens out to a 5.

(82 votes, average: 3.89 out of 5)

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