The James Harden school of offense meets the James Harden school of defense.
The James Harden school of offense meets the James Harden school of defense.
50 Shades of Grey chick Dakota Johnson hosted last night’s Saturday Night Live and was precisely as good as you’d expect someone to be after becoming famous for being tied up and fucked in the butt in a movie. But this skit was the only noteworthy one and people got all sorts of worked up (surprisingly the brilliant #SNLNeedsCancelled hashtag in the last tweet didn’t go viral though) because ISIS is something you “don’t joke about.” Internet Outrage 101: I don’t like it so it shouldn’t exist.
So where are we standing on this one? Personally I think it’s edgy and pretty funny in a way SNL often isn’t these days — maybe that’s why it’s so jarring to see — and it’s tied to something in the news with ISIS recruiting regular white chicks. It’s not like they had her sawing off Hulk Hogan’s head while a sad slowed down version of “Real American” played. And sometimes the best way to take power away from something truly dangerous is through parody. Speaking about ISIS only in whispers and horrible things they want us to see does nothing but further their agenda. Plus it’s just a good spin on the trite “kid going to college” ads. Just let a joke show do jokes sometimes, angry people of the Internet.
PS That chick in the last tweet is really good at Twitter:
— ESPN College BBall (@ESPNCBB) February 28, 2015
Yeah ok, nice try, Joey Brackets. This is faker than the moon landing. Pull harder, Miles, stop being such a lacky bitch. The truth is at stake here. The truth!
— Ezra (@e_woods23) February 28, 2015
A halfcourt alleyoop posterization facial, don’t see that one everyday.
Guys please, for the love of God, stop trying to block Montrezl. If you see the ball in the air, and know that #24 is checked in and on the court somewhere, just run the other way. Better yet drop down and get into the fetal position immediately. Guy is not human.
ROCHESTER, N.Y. —The five-bedroom vacation home that sits on the shore of Lake Ontario is usually vacant this time of year. It’s a beautiful house where the Maisel and Murray families gather during the summer when there is laughter and warmth in the air among mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, brothers and sisters, and aunts, uncles and cousins.
Now there is just concern, anxiety and fear.
“We’re praying very, very hard. This is the worst thing,” said Meg Murray, whose 21-year-old son Max Maisel has been missing since Sunday night. ”We miss him and we can’t wait to see him.”
Max is 6-feet, 5-inches tall and weighs about 135 pounds, his parents said. The junior at Rochester Institute of Technology wears dark-rimmed glasses and his vehicle, a bronze 2004 Acura SUV, was found at the Charlotte Pier. Anyone with any information that could help police find Maisel is asked to call 911.
Rochester Police Department investigators are working to piece together clues, the family said during an interview Thursday afternoon. Max Maisel was last seen around 8 p.m. Sunday by a passerby at the pier, about a mile from the Beach Avenue home the family has owned since 1999. It was windy and snowy Sunday night, but Max was dressed for the frigid weather, the passerby said, according to Max’s father, Ivan Maisel.
“There was a guy who saw him get out of his car,” said Ivan Maisel, a well-known senior writer for ESPN.com who covers college football. “The guy left and came back and the car was still there, and that unnerved him and he called the police.”
Maisel’s parents were contacted Monday night and made the 370-mile drive from their Fairfield, Connecticut, home Tuesday morning. Max had left his apartment on the RIT campus, where he is studying photography, on Sunday. He didn’t have his camera or his phone with him, but his parents said that wasn’t uncommon. “He’s not tied to his phone,” his mother said.
Ivan Maisel said he and his wife each texted Max last week and received responses from him. “We called him at some point over the weekend, and didn’t hear back from him but that wasn’t unusual,” Ivan Maisel said. “He’s not a talkative kid when you’re in the same room with him.”
The family said they’re not aware of anyone who’d want to harm Max. Police and a SCUBA team were seen searching near the pier on Thursday.
Officials at RIT, where the family visited Max’s apartment on Wednesday, have been very helpful, said Max’s parents, who met with RPD chief Michael Ciminelli on Thursday morning. “Investigators have been texting us. Everyone has given us access to them. They’ve all been terrific,” Meg Murray said.
Very, very sad story. If you hadn’t heard yet, Max Maisel, son of Ivan Maisel, a college football writer for ESPN, has been missing for almost a week now. He’s a junior at RIT and was last seen at Charlotte Pier on Lake Ontario in Rochester, NY. I don’t even want to speculate on what may have happened or what’s going on because that’s disrespectful to the family, but if you happen to have any seen or heard anything that could be even of the slightest help at all, please reach out to the Rochester police department as soon as you possibly can. It’s been frigid cold in Western New York this past week so I am sending all my prayers up that Max is safe somewhere. #FindMax
Also If you want to contribute as a Barstool viceroy email Paul@barstoolsports.com. We are looking for people at every school
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BAKIN SODA I GOT BAKIN SODA
Have a good weekend!
Design Taxi – Meet ‘Gluta’—she’s an adorable stray dog from Thailand who was once diagnosed with cervical cancer.
But thanks to the love and support from her adoptive family and doctors, she recovered from the disease and now she can’t stop smiling.
Her owners have decided to chronicle her cancer-free life in a loving photo series called ‘Gluta Story’.
This has been a long week with winter still not ending and the colors of a dress dividing this great nation. So let’s go out on a high note with these pics of Gluta. Inspiration all over the place. I don’t think I could even balance 10 slices of white bread on my head and I’m a mostly functional adult human being but here Gluta is doing it with a smile on her face. Normally I try not to seek out sick dog stories — I’ve got two adorable beasts so it’s kinda out of sight out of mind — but this dog’s big grins after having a rough go of things is way too infectious to avoid:
See? Infectious. I’d take both those bad bitches for a drive with their heads out the window for sure.
Check out more pics of Gluta and her story here. Perfect way to start a weekend that doesn’t involve booze or nipples (so like 327th on the overall list, but still).
The stars came out this week, with Zeddlena, Kanye, Big Sean, Skrillex and Diplo, Rihanna, Adventure Club, and Carnage and Makonnen all dropping absolute bombs. Happy listening, happy weekend!