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Barstool U Smokeshow of the Day – Savannah from Arizona
Apr 165:30PM EST



Introducing Savannah from Arizona.  Love ending the day with a Zona smoke.  Just puts such a nice little bow on it.

Smoke Patrol Activated For New Syracuse and Illinois Uniforms
Apr 165:05PM EST



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The Smoke Patrol is catching a beating today!  First Johnny Football’s new girl.  Now TWO uniforms at the same time.  Wow.  Hope it can handle all this action.  All I know is it’s a HUGE afternoon for blue and orange jerseys.  Illinois and Syracuse FTW.


#Mailtime Playlists
Apr 164:15PM EST

Shut it down, pick a playlist, and chill.

White KFC - quintessential white people shit


Gone Country - ummm, country

Gone Country

SkinnyFiat - riding rap


The Pulse - the freshest EDM on the planet


Beers & Dips - flawless mix of classic rock, country, hip-hop
Beers and Dips White

Boozin’ & Cruisin’ - today’s hotness, whoopy as hell

Boozin and Crusin

Hot Right Now - best new songs on earth

Bro’in Out - the real FIFA soundtrack


Rate This SHU Frat Bro’s Flag Football Pregame Speech
Apr 163:45PM EST


Greek Olympics at Sacred Heart University where a brother of Pi Kappa Phi gave a legendary speech prior to a flag football game.



SO FUCKING FIRED UP RIGHT NOW.  When did Ray Lewis morph into a white boy in a bucket hat?  When did Knute Rockne come back to life as a Pi Kappa Phi frat bro?  When did Coach Tony D’Amato become a Sacred Heart University student?  Most intense football speech ever, or maybe for any sport.  Sure it’s not exactly the Super Bowl or the BCS Championship.  It’s a flag football game for the Greek Olympics at a small college.   Don’t tell Bucket Hat Bro.  It’s life or death out there on the intramural fields of Fairfield Connecticut.



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PS – Guy in the background who said “this is for the seniors” before the speech is sneaky more hardo than anything Bucket Hat Bro said.





h/t Connor 

Tech Bro CEO Bids $12K To Coach ASU Football Team
Apr 163:10PM EST

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Arkansas - The prospect of being a head football coach has always been something of a dream for 25-year-old tech CEO Nick Bhardwaj. So when a recent visit to to check scores revealed a story about a unique fundraiser at Arkansas State University in which the school was auctioning off an opportunity to coach its football team during the spring game, Bhardwaj quickly jumped at the opportunity. When the week-long eBay auction closed Monday, Bhardwaj’s $11,700 bid was the highest.

“It’s something I probably never thought I’d get to experience in my life,” Bhardwaj said by phone Tuesday, a day before he was expecting to depart the San Francisco area where he lives and works for Jonesboro. “Don’t get me wrong, I understand it’s a spring game. But it should pretty much feel as real as possible, I’m hoping.”

The auction, which raised money for the Red Wolves Foundation, promised the winner to be head coach for the game, wearing a headset on the sideline, choosing what plays to call and even getting a “Powerade bath” on the sidelines when the game ends.

The coach could make all sorts of questionable football calls, like going for it on every fourth down or calling trick plays with regularity. But, Bhardwaj said, he takes the responsibility seriously. He’s already “done his homework,” researching ASU Coach Blake Anderson’s coaching style, looking at tape of other high-speed offenses, reviewing the roster and even spending time calling plays virtually in the NCAA 2014 video game.

“For me, I want to hit the ground running,” Bhardwaj said. “I’m not that guy who’s going to call a flea-flicker every three plays. I want to immerse myself so it feels like a real coaching experience.”

That means paying attention to less glitzy coaching duties like ensuring the right ratio of pass plays to run plays are called as the game progresses, Bhardwaj said.

“The one thing I don’t take lightly is this is still a meaningful game to the coaching staff,” he said. “They’re trying to see where the players are at.”

Natural Motion this year was bought by Zynga for more than $500 million. Bhardwaj left to focus on his own mobile gaming startup, Beyond Games, but he’s happy to take a break for a few days to try a different career path.




First of all this is absolutely awesome.  Getting to coach a college football team and actually having control and getting to call plays and shit based off of what you learned in NCAA 2014.   Totally worth the $12K.  My only thing is why settle for a Spring Game at Arkansas State?  Why some meaningless game for a meaningless program?    Just because they’re the ones having an eBay bid for a head coaching job?  Doesn’t mean you need to take that and be happy.  Don’t lower your standards like that dude.  Your company just got bought out for $527 MILLION!   Pony up some more of that cash and get yourself a job wearing the headsets on the sideline of an Alabama regular season game.  I want to see you calling a goal line play for LSU in Death Valley.  I want to see you running down the sidelines next to Red Lightning as Jameis Winston executes your touchdown play to perfect.  Now THAT would be amazing.   Some random bro with an NCAA 2014 on Xbox playbook determining the national championship game.  Money rules everything my man, make it happen.


Smokesmash Matchup from Hell, The U Edition: Harley vs. Claire
Apr 162:20PM EST

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And I didn’t go to Miami….why?






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1 for Harley…5 for Claire.


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Panama City Beach Trying To Ban Spring Break…HAHA
Apr 161:40PM EST


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AL - Locals who are fed up with the wild behavior often found in Panama City Beach during spring break continue to press the issue with local officials, and it appears they’re not going to let the issue slide.

Spring break was not on the agenda for Tuesday’s Bay County Commission meeting, but a group of fed-up residents showed up to discuss it anyway, according to a report in the Panama City News Herald. Last week, big crowds of locals turned out to voice their concerns about spring break at a the Tourist Development Council meeting and Panama City Beach City Council meeting.

Forced to actually address the issue, Bay County Commissioner Mike Thomas said “We have to make some changes,” adding “alcohol on the beach during spring break, I think, will be changed.”

Fellow Commissioner Bill Dozier said he agreed with most of the recommendations put forth by Sheriff Frank McKeithen, which included a ban of drinking on the beach, forcing bars to stop serving alcohol at 2 a.m. and other measures.

“There will be action taken,” Dozier said, according to the News Herald. “We’re not going to sweep this under the rug.”

Bill Buskell, owner of the popular Pineapple Willy’s bar and restaurant, was again at the lead of local residents demanding something be done. Buskell reportedly told the commission that he supported blocking alcohol from the beaches even if it cost him $150,000 in daiquiri sales. He says he doesn’t want Panama City Beach to become the “Tijuana of the South.”




Hey PCB.  ”Good luck.” (-Marko from Tropoja).  Trying to ban Spring Break in Panama City Beach.  Like trying to ban apple pie in America.  Like trying to ban water from being wet.   Some things are just meant to be.

Seriously what’s the deal with Bill from Pineapple Willy’s?  Bro you opened a bar in Panama City Beach.  What the fuck were you expecting exactly?  You don’t want the place your bar is located to become the Tijuana of the South?   You’d rather sacrifice $150K in sales than have kids drinking on Spring Break?  WORST BAR OWNER EVER.  Honestly bro Taffer would shut your shit down and walk out on you in the first 10 minutes of the show.

Bottom line is you can raise all the stink and make all the scary Spring Break exposé videos you want, a good old fashioned completely trashy Spring Break experience in PCB ain’t going out without a fight.  Cue the music!







h/t Richmond (baller name)

Noah Gets In To College
Apr 161:00PM EST


LITTLE CHUTE, Wis. (KMSP) - “I got accepted! Yes! Dad, you rock! I love you!” Those were the words of Little Chute. Wis. high school senior Noah VanVooren, after learning he was accepted to Edgewood College in Madison, Wis.




Fuck yeah Noah.   Such a frat boy move just ripping your shirt off and flexing too.  Noah is gonna fit in just fine.





PS – If Edgewood football doesn’t stick Noah in starting tailback spot immediately their coach has 0 clue what he’s doing.




Sango x Goldlink – Wassup
Apr 1612:20PM EST


Dirty beat, dirty bars, just all around filth. You’re gonna be hearing about Goldlink, a lot.


Reader Email – The Dean of Students at Bucknell Sent Everyone Pterodactyl Porn Last Night
Apr 1611:40AM EST

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———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Susan Lantz
Date: Tue, Apr 15, 2014 at 10:14 PM
Subject: [STUDENTS] BSG Constitution Results

Dear Bucknell Students,

On behalf of BSG, attached are the results of vote on the new BSG
constitution. We would like to offer our sincerest apologies on the
the way the proposal was handled. We realized the folly in neglecting
student input; therefore, we are opening an online discussion forum
for all students. Please use the attached link where you may submit
your opinions.

We value your input and hold it in the highest regard. Access the
forum here:  (NSFW)

Susan Lant



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Either Bucknell has an experienced hacker running rampant on campus, or their Dean of Students watches some REALLY weird pornography.  I like to think it’s the latter.   Just picturing some high up member of the Bucknell administration posted up in her office surrounded by leather bound books with her feet up on her mahogany desk just watching some prehistoric birds double team the shit out of some blonde chick.  Sending out important student information for the upcoming week then switching back to her Incognito tab of a girl getting railed by a flying reptile from the Jurassic Period.   That’s what I choose to believe is happening at Bucknell.  Forget some pimply faced computer geek, give me a super freaky Dean who is into Pterodactyl Dinosaur Spermo Plasmoids and sucks at’ing things.




PS – How about the 80.34% “Like” rate on that video?