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Bud Selig May Be Retiring As MLB Commissioner But Goddammit He’s Going To Do It With A+ Flow
Oct 3012:18AM EST


(Selig being delightful at 0:30 in the video)



How do you combat complaints that MLB players aren’t big enough personalities or household names? You bring out the big guns for the World Series trophy presentation like Chevy’s resident Captain Charisma Rikk Wylde and departing MLB Commissioner Bud Selig. Charm, movie star good looks and the kind of stage presence you typically only see accompanied by overbearing dance moms on TLC shows. That Voldemort-looking Adam Silver might be over there bringing the NBA $26 billion TV deals and a position just behind the NFL atop the sports world but Bud Selig’s leaving baseball on top with a classic Game 7 and the kind of lettuce a lax bro could only dream of. Here’s to 25 years of relative incompetence, Bud.



(GIF via TBL, video via Awful Announcing

Galantis – Runaway (U + I) (Kaskade Remix)
Oct 298:30PM EST

Galantis are pretty much the coolest cats in EDM right now, and a Kaskade remix of their latest unbelievably awesome single “Runaway (U + I)”  definitely doesn’t hurt their case.  Not as hot as Elephante’s “Help” remix, but who’s counting besides me.

FSU Holds Practice At A Public Park Next To Joe’s Crab Shack in Louisville
Oct 297:10PM EST

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Courier – Journal - I looked outside at the beautiful fall afternoon on Wednesday and decided to go for a run. I was on River Road, maybe 100 yards past the Big Four pedestrian bridge on the downtown side, when a parks employee driving a golf cart screeched to a halt next to me.

“Do you like football?” he asked.

I told him that I did like football.

“Florida State is practicing in the park over there. Go heckle them.”

He didn’t know that I was a journalist, and clearly I wasn’t going to heckle them, but I was going to take a look. So I kept jogging until I came to the large, flat field near Joe’s Crab Shack. And there was Florida State, going through a walkthrough practice to prepare for Thursday night’s game against Louisville.

There was quarterback Jameis Winston. There was coach Jimbo Fisher. And there were Florida State staff members, sort of guarding the perimeter so they wouldn’t be disturbed. A security guard asked me to step off the edge of the grass and onto the sidewalk, and I did.

Then I took out my phone to take a picture, and two FSU staff members started freaking out.

“No pictures!” ”Put that away!”

I calmly told them that this was a public park, and that anyone can take pictures at a public park. They told me they had reserved the field. I said that I wasn’t trying to use the field they had reserved. I was just taking a picture of it.  They told me to talk to the police, and then pointed me toward a Waterfront Park staff member, who was clearly not a policeman. I explained my situation to him, and he understood. He just asked that I stay back from the practice, and that was reasonable.




Kind of have to think Jimbo did this on purpose right?  Like fuck everybody, they want to make their snide little jokes on their dumb little blogs, lets troll the shit out of them and have practice next to a literal crab shack.   Everybody likes self-deprecating humor.



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PS – Holding practice in a public park then telling people they aren’t allowed to take pictures.  Leave it to FSU to have no concept about how the law works.

Barstool U Hump Day Smokeshow – Vi from Florida Atlantic U.
Oct 295:30PM EST

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Introducing Vi from FAU.  Happy Hump Day indeed!


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So This PSA About Chinese Food Is Supposed To Make Me Not Want To Smoke Weed? You’re Sure?
Oct 294:50PM EST



This video is part of a New Zealand campaign to stop people from “drug driving” which is obviously a delightfully New Zealand way of saying driving while stoned. But am I wrong in saying that other than the increased risk of driving myself into paralysis because there was a funny looking silhouette in the middle of the road this sounds like a great way to spend my time getting high? They’re just pumping me full of crispy duck, providing me with golden cats to stare at, then putting me back on the road with a smile on my face and a gong-based song in my heart. Not to mention that this is legitimately the nicest any Chinese food store owner has ever been to a customer. I didn’t even know they could smile until I saw this. Lifestyle upgrades all around just by having the courage to smoke and drive with no regard for others. I wouldn’t have known that without New Zealand.



Hard to top this other New Zealand PSA that blew up a couple years ago, though.




Fucking Monique, man. This dude almost let his drunk buddy die just to not risk missing a shot at that ass. She must be wrecking upside down Kiwi dicks left and right.


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The red satin jacket and the lack of makeup say no but the giant hoop earrings say yes.

Penguin Prison – Calling Out (Elephante Remix)
Oct 294:10PM EST

Dance music’s hottest young star turns out another gem of a remix, spinning Penguin Prison’s new smash single “Calling Out” into a dance floor gem, a perfect mix of bass and synths with just enough indie flare.


New Jersey College Professor Reinstated After 6 Month Unpaid Suspension For Posting A Picture Of His Daughter Wearing A “Game of Thrones” T-Shirt
Oct 293:50PM EST

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Huff Po - Last April, I wrote about the absurd treatment of Professor Francis Schmidt by Bergen Community College (BCC) officials who seem better suited for Westeros than New Jersey.

Schmidt, an art and animation professor, posted a picture of his young daughter wearing a T-shirt with the Game of Thrones quote, “I will take what is mine with fire & blood” to Google+, which automatically sent an email of the picture to his Google+ contacts, including a BCC dean.

The dean found this picture of a child doing yoga so terror-inducing that she reported him to other BCC administrators. (I have a hunch she wouldn’t do well watching a typical episode of Game of Thrones.) Exhibiting the same lack of common sense, BCC officials claimed that Schmidt posed a danger to the school community. Why? Believe it or not, the administrators argued that the “fire” mentioned on the T-shirt “could be a kind of proxy for ‘AK-47s.’” Schmidt was then placed on leave without pay until he agreed to undergo a psychiatric evaluation.

My organization, the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE), contacted Schmidt after the incident and got him top shelf legal representation. Now, months later, Schmidt’s free speech ordeal at BCC is finally over.

Here’s our update, posted this morning:

After learning of BCC’s outrageous actions, the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE) connected Professor Francis Schmidt with FIRE Legal Network member Derek Shaffer, a partner at the law firm Quinn Emanuel Urquhart & Sullivan, and Gabriel Soledad, an associate at the firm.

In a recent letter to Schmidt, BCC Director of Human Resources Patti Bonomolo acknowledged that the college “may have lacked basis” for punishing him and that doing so “potentially violated” his constitutional rights. “Lest there be any doubt, BCC recognizes and respects that you are free to exercise your constitutional rights, including your right to freedom of speech and expression, even to the extent that you may disparage BCC and/or its officials,” wrote Bonomolo.

While I’m glad to see BCC finally acknowledge Professor Schmidt’s First Amendment rights and rescind his punishment, saying that Bergen Community College’s punishment of Schmidt ‘may have lacked basis’ is like saying that King Joffrey may have been a less than ideal ruler.

Meanwhile, Professor Schmidt reports: “I’m very happy to have my First Amendment rights back. I’m glad to have this thing behind me and would like to get back to teaching animation.”




Ok this is more like it.  Knew we got a little too far off track with that last blog about someone employed by a college who actually had some common sense, better rein it back a little bit with one of the most ABSURD moves I’ve ever seen in my entire life.   Suspending a teacher, for 6 months, without pay because he posted a picture of his daughter on Facebook wearing a GOT shirt?  To the point he had to get legal representation to get reinstated after half a year because of a 5 year old with a Daenerys Targaryen quote?   That’s something that I don’t believe happened in real life.

Like forget for a moment that it’s just a quote from a TV show.  Maybe the dean doesn’t watch Game of Thrones, that’s fair.  Too busy reading academia journals and shit to enjoy one of the best shows on television, whatever. But even as just a standalone t-shirt with a completely random quote.  You’re that physically threatened by it?  I mean it’s your job to mold minds and prepare adults for the real world, and you think a small child in fantasy TV show t-shirt on Facebook makes the father a danger to the school community.  Unreal.




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UPenn Offers “Wasting Time On The Internet 101″ Class
Oct 293:30PM EST

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VICE - Next semester at the University of Pennsylvania, students will walk into a classroom, pull out their laptops, their smartphones, their tablets, and sit there, for three hours, doing what they no doubt do pretty often: Waste time on the internet.

The Ivy League school’s newest creative writing class is trying to remove the stigma from an activity that millions of people do on a daily basis, in an attempt to explore how our minds might work when we’re totally aimlessly clicking through reddit or Facebook or Buzzfeed or watching porn or doing whatever the hell people do in their free time.

“I’m very tired of reading articles in the New York Times every week that make us feel bad about spending so much time on the internet, about dividing our attention so many times,” Kenneth Goldsmith, a world-renowned poet and the course’s professor, told me. “I think it’s complete bullshit that the internet is making us dumber. I think the internet is making us smarter. There’s this new morality built around guilt and shame in the digital age.”



Best class ever.  Most importantly best professor ever.    Honestly don’t remember the last time I heard or read something about a college professor or administrator that actually impressed me, but Prof Goldsmith just did.  Not even talking about how big of a badass mofo he looks like in that hat and outfit, because he does.  Stylin and profilin to the absolute max.   But the fact that he actually sounds like a rational human being who has common sense and knows how the real world works.  A guy who is actually in touch with his students and not some dinosaur taking mandatory attendance then reading out of a 50 year old text for 45 minutes.  The internet is awesome plain and simple and wasting time on the internet is basically what I’m here for so I endorse it 10000%.

Smokesmash Matchup from Hell – Kindly from Kentucky vs. Madison from Ursinus
Oct 292:50PM EST

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Kindly from UK


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Madison from Ursinus


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1 for Kindly…5 for Madison



1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (488 votes, average: 4.10 out of 5)
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Wisconsin Professor Cancels Morning Class, Bro Responds To Class Email Chain Inviting Girls To Come Sleep In His Bed With Him
Oct 292:20PM EST













Oh of couurrssee this professor freaked out and made a big fuss about it.  Why would anyone be allowed to make a harmless joke in today’s climate?  Not on this prof’s watch.


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So inappropriate.  So much sexual harassment.  Basically a rapist in training IMO.  Just glad he apologized before all the girls in the class felt too violated.   There’s just no place in today’s society for an open invitation to your bedroom no matter how many pillows you have or how comfortable your down comforter is.





(via TFM )