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Kliff Kingsbury Says Hitting On Married Moms Of Recruits “Can Get Weird…You Just Have Fun”

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fkliff-kingsbury-says-hitting-on-married-moms-of-recruits-can-get-weird-you-just-have-fun%2F
Jul 311:30PM EST

 

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Lettermen - Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury went on ESPN’s “Highly Questionable” Wednesday to talk about pretty much everything except football.  Dan Le Batard and Bomani Jones were able to squeeze in one or two questions about football in the five-minute interview, but it was mostly par for the course as these things go. Here are some highlights:

On being mistaken for Ryan Gosling: “I’ll take that one. You get an A-list celebrity you take that compliment.”

On filming The Notebook: “Stay focused. Stay within the script. Not getting carried away with the emotion.”

On his “game” compared to Johnny Manziel’s: “I would hope I’ve had a lot more practice than him.”

On being too sexy: “I just try to be myself. Dress like I want to dress, act like I want to act. As long as you’re winning games the rest will take care of itself.”

On hitting on married moms: “It can get weird. I stop at that point. You just have fun, it’s obviously not going anywhere.”

On his wildest interaction with a female fan: “That would be signing some cleavage.”

 

 

 

At this point I honestly feel like it’s just a matter of time before we find out Kliff Kingsbury like killed a hooker and dumped her in a trash can in Lubbock last year.  That he’s a serial killer by night that shoots stray cats in the head and feeds them to ATM machines.  That he’s got a dungeon full of dead bodies and skin suits or something.  I mean there’s just no way somebody can be this perfect.  This cool, calm, collected, funny.  This much of a stud.   No I don’t want to date him.  I just want to be him.

Sidenote, I wonder what you do when you’re a recruit and you wake up and head downstairs in the morning and Kliff is sitting shirtless at your table drinking milk out of the carton while your mom cooks eggs wearing his Tech T-shirt from the day before.  Do you get mad or do you sign immediately?

Dallas Cowboys Coach Throws Buckets Of Ice Water At Shirtless Players While They Try To Catch Balls

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Jul 3112:35PM EST

(skip to 1:15 for the relevant part)

 

Love what you do and you’ll never work a day in your life:

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The buzz on the street is that new Cowboys TE coach Mike Pope uses some unconventional methods to keep his players’ heads in the game. And, according to an interview on the Cowboys’ website, the whole thing is about learning how to catch a ball while avoiding distractions. Star TE Jason Witten claims there’s a “method to the madness” and that it’d be silly to question him given that he’s an all-time great tight ends coach. And you know what? You can’t question results like these that Pope got out of Brandon Myers and Bear Pascoe on the Giants last year:

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Neither guy is on the Giants any more so they probably just couldn’t adapt to the Sanduskian genius at play here. The NFC East better watch out because the Cowboys are going to be all soft hands and hard nips this season.

 

 

If nothing else, I’m cautiously optimistic that the end game here is this being the Cowboys’ 2015 tight end depth chart:

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Trademark – Moving On (Kelly Clarkson X Audien)

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Jul 3112:20PM EST

Did we just get the “Since U Been Gone” techno remix? I think we did!

Download Trademark’s “Moving On”

Penn State Coach Herb Hand Drops Any Recruit That Says Something Degrading Towards Women On Twitter

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Jul 3111:45AM EST

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247 - High school and college coaches continually preach about prospects being careful about what they post on social media, and Penn State offensive line coach Herb Hand became the latest to state just how important social media is to the evaluation process.

When asked about the stance, Hand told 247Sports,

“If a guy makes the decision to post or RT stuff that degrades women, references drug use or cyber-bullying crap, then I can make the decision to drop them,” Hand said. “Especially if I have discussed it with them prior, and especially in today’s climate of athletics.”

 

 

 

No objectifying women or cyberbullying?   What else do you even tweet about?  Did Coach Hand just exclude 99.4% of men on Twitter from playing for Penn State?   I mean that’s the only reason you create a Twitter account.  To tweet at chicks and talk shit to people.

Can’t even imagine how hard it is to stick by this policy in 2014.  With the combination of how cutthroat recruiting has become and how every kid basically over the age of 12 has a Twitter account you might regret drawing such a strong line in the sand when it comes to needing talent.   Seriously good for Penn State for finding some morals and sticking to them but we’ll see how it plays out when they get one of the top 10 guys in the country signed up then he shoots out a tweet about some thick thirst trappin’ booty.  Or gets his first dose of trash talk from a rival and calls him a loser fuckboy.  Herb might have to log off for the day and pretend he didn’t see that.

 

 

PS – If you’re an athlete and you tweet about using drugs you deserve to be not only dumped from your program but kicked off Twitter for life and probably just kicked off Earth in general. No room for anyone that stupid around here.

 

 

 

Alexandria Morgan Singlehandedly Proves That, Yes, Hot Women Can Be Funny

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Jul 3110:45AM EST


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I’ve been pretty enamored (read: quietly collecting newspapers to cut individual letters out to send her a note) with Alexandria Morgan since she did that little strapless bra jogging video. I’m just a sucker for tall hot chicks with pouty lips, it’s a weakness. But imagine my surprise as I came across the above Instagram while doing my usual browsing. A little unexpected A+ comedy to get the day going instead of the usual saucy photography. It’s not all looks and nip-blast photos like this:

 

 

Nope, sometimes you can follow your favorite model on Vine and get some belly laughs from things like this:

 

 

Ha yeah those are totally different accents! Dr. Pepper does sound different each time she says it! Just nuts, wild stuff, the kind of crazy observational humor only seen this side of Seinfeld.

 

 

Oh man! Total comedic misdirection there! I thought she was crying over a person but lol no just some Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. It’s also great because I too enjoy when chocolate and peanut butter come together unexpectedly. Hilarious and relatable, the kind of comedy we all enjoy.

 

 

Omg bae that is not your normal face! You are making faces that are different from your normal face and, you know what? It has me in STITCHES. Might have to go to the ER because my sides have completely split like a banana peel lol. Nothing wrong with a little physical comedy. Charlie Chaplin, Jim Carrey, Alexandria Morgan.

 

Just laughs all over the place and, even better, she doesn’t have to work blue like some of your favorite comedians. Good ol’ fashioned guffaws for the whole family, that’s what I need in my life.

Iowa Football Launches Promotion To Offer Free Tuition To 5 Students Who Buy Season Tickets…Immediately Cancels It Because It’s Illegal

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Jul 3110:25AM EST

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IOWA CITY, IowaLegal concerns have forced the University of Iowa to suspend a promotion offering free tuition to five randomly selected students who purchased football season tickets.

Athletic director Gary Barta says he has decided to temporarily shutter the offer after questions were raised about whether it complies with state raffle laws.

Iowa says the free tuition package is worth roughly $8,000. The award also can be used to cover fees, books and related supplies for the upcoming fall and spring semesters.

The Hawkeyes also were planning prizes such as $500 in school supplies and $1,000 gift cards to a local grocery store chain in an effort to boost lagging student ticket sales.

Iowa has seen those numbers drop from 10,000 to roughly 7,000 in less than two years.

 

 

 

Poor fucking Iowa.  Just desperately struggling for relevance and shooting themselves right in the foot.    Launch this huge promotion and become the top story in all of college football yesterday.  The talk of the town.  A big story on all the afternoon talk shows.  Iowa this, Iowa that, Iowa in everyone’s mouth.  Annndd cancel it less than 24 hours later because you did 0 research and it’s actually totally illegal.  I don’t know what else to say other than that’s so Iowa.  Personally I don’t see how offering kids free tuition when they come out to support the football team is in any way a bad thing, so this law seems incredibly stupid.  But I also know if I was in charge of promotions for the team I would probbbbbably check out the rules and regulations for it before giving it the old go-ahead.

Oregon Football Releases Scratch N Sniff Tickets That Smell Like Carl’s Jr. Cheeseburgers

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Foregon-football-releases-scratch-n-sniff-tickets-that-smell-like-carls-jr-cheeseburgers%2F
Jul 3110:15AM EST

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Oregon football.  No shame in the gimmick game.  Wacky offenses, flashy players, 120 jerseys a year featuring every color you’ve ever heard of.  Hologram tickets.  Foil tickets.  Scratch N Sniff tickets that smell like cheeseburgers.   Ducks fans are so spoiled, could anyone possibly have a better fan experience?  Well I guess a National Championship would be cool.  But you can’t have everything.

 

Hey Oregon.  Save your scented meat tickets.  Let me sit in a box with all the Carl’s Jr. girls instead and I’ll buy every fucking ticket you got.

 

 

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Female Firefighter Gets $60K After Her Boss Slapped Her Ass And Yelled “Badonkadonk!” In The Fire Station

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Ffemale-firefighter-gets-60k-after-her-boss-slapped-her-ass-and-yelled-badonkadonk-in-the-fire-station%2F
Jul 319:35AM EST

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Daily Mail - A female volunteer firefighter has been awarded $60,000 after a male lieutenant slapped her on the bottom.

Single-mom Beatrice Lozada, 35, brought a sexual harassment claim against Elmont Volunteer Fire Department.

She filed the Division of Human Rights complaint in 2011 saying he repeatedly slapped her bottom and while shouting ‘badonkadonk’ – which is slang for buttocks and a term Urban Dictionary describes as ‘an extremely curvaceous behind.’

‘They made a lot of comments about my body. I have a very big butt and they would make a lot of comments about that,’ Lozada told The Post on Wednesday.

She said she tried to dress as unattractively as she could for the role to not attract attention.

‘I had to dress like a boy, talk like a boy, because I wanted to be as unattractive as possible,’ she said. ‘They said badonkadonk. They would say, ‘You have a fat a**.’

 

 

 

Ugh, fucking sexual harrassment these days.    It’s like you can’t even flatter a co-worker anymore without getting thrown into court and exposed as some sort of misogynistic prick.   Can’t even compliment a nice body feature without having some judge throw the book at you.  Probably Sam Ponder’s fault somehow.  Listen I get it, you can’t just go around making the women in your workplace feel uncomfortable all day.  Can’t make them feel like they’re in an unsafe environment or that they aren’t respected.  That’s how you breed the Ray Rice’s of the world that don’t respect women and knock them out during every little disagreement.  But a little pat on the tush and a Badonkadonk chant?  That needs a Human Rights complaint?   So sensitive.  Come on.  You got an extremely curvaceous behind.  Embrace it and let’s fight some fires.

 

 

 

Barstool U Smokeshow of the Day – Alexa from USC

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Jul 319:00AM EST

 

 

Introducing Alexa from USC.  Trojans burning the place down as usual.

Bastille – Pompeii (Slander Heaven Trap Edit)

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Jul 309:00PM EST

Trap wizards Slander run it back with their latest release, lending Bastille’s “Pompeii” the remix touch that’s got the LA-based production duo blowing up real quick.

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