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Marist Bro Hits Halfcourt Shot for $10K…Crowd Goes Insane

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Oct 3011:00AM EST

 

 

Is hitting a half court shot in front the entire school the most exciting thing ever?   Starting to think it is.  Like these reactions and the celebrations afterwards are more intense than 90% of actual athletes winning their actual athletic competitions.  I saw like 3, maybe 4 court stormings last year that could have topped these doofuses hitting halfcourt shots to win some cash, if that.

 

 

 

 

 

If you want to know what it feels like to be the sports king of campus for a night, forget about playing sports kids.  Just show up as a normal student and enter one of these shooting contests.  Lottttt less work.

Katherine Webb Ate 40 Burgers For Her Carl’s Jr. Commercial

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Oct 3010:20AM EST

 

kwebb1

 

 

 

USA TodayWhat’s the biggest difference between football in the South and football everywhere else?

“In the South, we don’t have the big cities to go to. On the weekends we tailgate. Friday nights we watch local college football. It’s pretty much a religion in the South.”

Who gets recognized first when you and AJ are out in public.

“AJ. Not many people watch pageants, but a lot of people watch football. I’m OK with that.”

What was the hardest part of shooting your famous Carl’s Jr., commercial?

“I bit into 40 cold burgers in one night from about midnight until five or six in the morning. That was great.”

 

 

 

Not a bad life K Webb set up for herself huh?  Become a celebrity simply for being hot as hell standing in a crowded stadium and having an old man drool on her.  Marry a career backup NFL quarterback, always pulling in steady paychecks but never getting too big an ego to leave her.  Get paid to post pictures on Instagram and do a couple photoshoots a week in a bikini.  Do some swimming reality shows.   Get flooded with free delicious cheeseburgers and collect a check for biting into them while your thighs hang out.  Nothing easier than life as a hot chick.

 

 

 

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Scouts Say Marcus Mariota Might Be “Too Nice” For The NFL

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Oct 309:40AM EST

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NFLIt’s the job of NFL scouts, and by extension, the general managers that oversee them, to find flaws in college prospects.

They all have them — some more obvious than others — and a failure to identify them correctly can manifest itself into a wasted draft pick. As such, even the elite prospects that are considered surefire first-round draft picks will get their share of scrutiny, even if it’s more microscopic — or myopic — in nature.

Enter Oregon quarterback Marcus Mariota, who has 24 touchdowns to only one interception this season, but might be too nice for the NFL, according to one NFL scout. Yep, too nice.

“Like if you punched him in the stomach, he might apologize to you,” the scout told Sports Illustrated. “I just don’t know if he’s that alpha male that you’re looking for. The kid’s kind of a fly on the wall kind of guy. Physically, he’s really talented, but it’s going to take a little time. If you’re expecting him to come in and be your savior year one, I don’t think that’s going to be it.”

 

 

 

Talk about different ends of the spectrum for your top 2 quarterback draft prospects.  We got one Heisman winner in danger of dropping off draft boards for being such a dumb asshole, and the other top Heisman contender accused of being wayyyy too nice.   Night and day.  Personally I would look at 2290 yards this season at a 70% completion rate and his career 87 TDs to 11 interceptions before I analyzed how he helped old ladies cross the street and holds the door open too long for people, but then again I’m not paid to do this professionally.   Sometimes a team just needs an alpha male.   Look at Vince Young.

 

 

Listen I don’t fault scouts at all for saying this stuff and I don’t fault GMs for taking in their advice.  It’s their job, they do this professionally, and if I’m about to use my franchise’s top 10 pick and contract money on some college kid I want to know EVERYTHING about him.    Does he cry during romcoms, does he pee sitting down, does he drink Cosmos at the bar, does he put ketchup on his steak.   All of it matters.  All of it.

 

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They’re not always off base.

 

 

All I know is if it’s between a super nice guy like Marcus Mariota and a guy like Jameis Winston on draft day I know who I want leading my franchise.  Rather try and toughen a guy up than constantly have to bail him out of jail.

 

 

Barstool U Smokeshow of the Day – Janie from Arizona

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Oct 309:00AM EST

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Introducing Janie from Arizona.  So close to the weekend I can taste it.

 

 

 

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Bud Selig May Be Retiring As MLB Commissioner But Goddammit He’s Going To Do It With A+ Flow

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Fbud-selig-may-be-retiring-as-mlb-commissioner-but-goddammit-hes-going-to-do-it-with-a-flow%2F
Oct 3012:18AM EST

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(Selig being delightful at 0:30 in the video)

 

 

How do you combat complaints that MLB players aren’t big enough personalities or household names? You bring out the big guns for the World Series trophy presentation like Chevy’s resident Captain Charisma Rikk Wylde and departing MLB Commissioner Bud Selig. Charm, movie star good looks and the kind of stage presence you typically only see accompanied by overbearing dance moms on TLC shows. That Voldemort-looking Adam Silver might be over there bringing the NBA $26 billion TV deals and a position just behind the NFL atop the sports world but Bud Selig’s leaving baseball on top with a classic Game 7 and the kind of lettuce a lax bro could only dream of. Here’s to 25 years of relative incompetence, Bud.

 

 

(GIF via TBL, video via Awful Announcing

Galantis – Runaway (U + I) (Kaskade Remix)

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Oct 298:30PM EST

Galantis are pretty much the coolest cats in EDM right now, and a Kaskade remix of their latest unbelievably awesome single “Runaway (U + I)”  definitely doesn’t hurt their case.  Not as hot as Elephante’s “Help” remix, but who’s counting besides me.

FSU Holds Practice At A Public Park Next To Joe’s Crab Shack in Louisville

http%3A%2F%2Fbarstoolu.barstoolsports.com%2Frandom-thoughts%2Ffsu-holds-practice-at-a-public-park-next-to-joes-crab-shack-in-louisville%2F
Oct 297:10PM EST

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Courier – Journal - I looked outside at the beautiful fall afternoon on Wednesday and decided to go for a run. I was on River Road, maybe 100 yards past the Big Four pedestrian bridge on the downtown side, when a parks employee driving a golf cart screeched to a halt next to me.

“Do you like football?” he asked.

I told him that I did like football.

“Florida State is practicing in the park over there. Go heckle them.”

He didn’t know that I was a journalist, and clearly I wasn’t going to heckle them, but I was going to take a look. So I kept jogging until I came to the large, flat field near Joe’s Crab Shack. And there was Florida State, going through a walkthrough practice to prepare for Thursday night’s game against Louisville.

There was quarterback Jameis Winston. There was coach Jimbo Fisher. And there were Florida State staff members, sort of guarding the perimeter so they wouldn’t be disturbed. A security guard asked me to step off the edge of the grass and onto the sidewalk, and I did.

Then I took out my phone to take a picture, and two FSU staff members started freaking out.

“No pictures!” ”Put that away!”

I calmly told them that this was a public park, and that anyone can take pictures at a public park. They told me they had reserved the field. I said that I wasn’t trying to use the field they had reserved. I was just taking a picture of it.  They told me to talk to the police, and then pointed me toward a Waterfront Park staff member, who was clearly not a policeman. I explained my situation to him, and he understood. He just asked that I stay back from the practice, and that was reasonable.

 

 

 

Kind of have to think Jimbo did this on purpose right?  Like fuck everybody, they want to make their snide little jokes on their dumb little blogs, lets troll the shit out of them and have practice next to a literal crab shack.   Everybody likes self-deprecating humor.

 

 

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PS – Holding practice in a public park then telling people they aren’t allowed to take pictures.  Leave it to FSU to have no concept about how the law works.

Barstool U Hump Day Smokeshow – Vi from Florida Atlantic U.

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Oct 295:30PM EST

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Introducing Vi from FAU.  Happy Hump Day indeed!

 

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So This PSA About Chinese Food Is Supposed To Make Me Not Want To Smoke Weed? You’re Sure?

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Oct 294:50PM EST

 

 

This video is part of a New Zealand campaign to stop people from “drug driving” which is obviously a delightfully New Zealand way of saying driving while stoned. But am I wrong in saying that other than the increased risk of driving myself into paralysis because there was a funny looking silhouette in the middle of the road this sounds like a great way to spend my time getting high? They’re just pumping me full of crispy duck, providing me with golden cats to stare at, then putting me back on the road with a smile on my face and a gong-based song in my heart. Not to mention that this is legitimately the nicest any Chinese food store owner has ever been to a customer. I didn’t even know they could smile until I saw this. Lifestyle upgrades all around just by having the courage to smoke and drive with no regard for others. I wouldn’t have known that without New Zealand.

 

 

Hard to top this other New Zealand PSA that blew up a couple years ago, though.

 

 

 

Fucking Monique, man. This dude almost let his drunk buddy die just to not risk missing a shot at that ass. She must be wrecking upside down Kiwi dicks left and right.

 

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The red satin jacket and the lack of makeup say no but the giant hoop earrings say yes.

Penguin Prison – Calling Out (Elephante Remix)

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Oct 294:10PM EST

Dance music’s hottest young star turns out another gem of a remix, spinning Penguin Prison’s new smash single “Calling Out” into a dance floor gem, a perfect mix of bass and synths with just enough indie flare.

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