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Yes There Is A Taken 3…Yes It’s Called “Tak3n”…And Yes The Trailer Looks AWESOME
Sep 301:30PM EST


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Lot of people will say Citizen Kane is the best movie of all time.  For my money it’s Taken, but whatever, we’ll leave that for the Roepers of the world to argue about.   And yes Taken 2 was maybe one of the biggest disasters to ever hit a movie theater screen, will fully admit that.  But I’m not being even 1% sarcastic when I say that Taken 3…excuse me, Tak3n…trailer looks absolutely en fuego.  Like “must see on its release day” type fuego.  Switched up the plot enough to keep it fresh and not stupid, added Forest Whitaker, Liam Neeson looks as badass as ever….can you say Oscar bait?  I can, and it’s pronounced “tayk-three-n.”




PS – Need more Maggie Grace running.




Aer – Whatever We Want (Remix ft. Dizzy Wright)
Sep 301:00PM EST

Aer team up with Dizzy Wright for a fresh remix of their party smash “Whatever We Want.”

Stream more from Aer

Chick In Yoga Pants Humping The Shit Out Of A Pond At A Festival Seems Like An Awesome Time
Sep 3012:15PM EST



Get it girl! The rail thin dude all messed up to her right seems like he’s not fulfilling her needs well enough so you might as well go after a body of water in the hopes of getting a little something out of whatever MDMA-based high she might be riding out. Not necessarily the kind of girl you marry but definitely the type who’d wreck your dick better than anyone else at TomorrowWorld might, possibly literally given how uncoordinated she seems. Probably what happened to Trey Burke’s periscope dick, actually.



What’s the hotter move: The hair toss or the seemingly endless booty shake?




Not even sure if that’s a good ass or not when the yoga pants come off but it doesn’t even matter. When you’ve got a wobble like that, I’m all in.



(via Uproxx)

Romance Game Changer…New “Good2Go” App Has The Girl You’re With Input How Drunk She Is And Confirm That She’s Giving Consent To Have Sex With You
Sep 3011:34AM EST

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Slate - Last June, Reason’s Robby Soave called for an iPhone app that would clear up pesky he-said, she-said rape cases by recording “mutual consent” to engage in sexual activity before two people do the deed: “Maybe they would have to input a password and then touch phones, or something?” he proposed. Last week, his prayers were answered: The Good2Go sexual consent app isn’t as touch-and-go as the app of Soave’s dreams, but it does encourage sex partners to assess their mutual interest in sex and record their intoxication levels before getting busy.

Here’s how it works: After deciding that you would like to have sex with someone, launch the Good2Go app (free on iTunes and Google Play), hand the phone off to your potential partner, and allow him or her to navigate the process to determine if he or she is ready and willing. “Are We Good2Go?” the first screen asks, prompting the partner to answer “No, Thanks,” “Yes, but … we need to talk,” or “I’m Good2Go.” If the partner chooses door No. 1, a black screen pops up that reads “Remember! No means No! Only Yes means Yes, BUT can be changed to NO at anytime!” If he or she opts instead to have a conversation before deciding—imagine, verbally communicating with someone with whom you may imminently engage in sexual intercourse—the app pauses to allow both parties to discuss.

If the partner—let’s assume for the purposes of this blog post, partner is a she—indicates that she is “Good2Go,” she’s sent to a second screen that asks if she is “Sober,” “Mildly Intoxicated,” “Intoxicated but Good2Go,” or “Pretty Wasted.” If she chooses “Pretty Wasted,” the app informs her that she “cannot consent” and she’s instructed to return the phone back to its owner (and presumably, not have sex under any circumstances, young lady). All other choices lead to a third screen, which asks the partner if she is an existing Good2Go user or a new one. If she’s a new user, she’s prompted to enter her phone number and a password, confirm that she is 18 years old, and press submit. (Minors are out of luck—the app is only for consenting adults.) Then, she’ll fill out a fourth prompt, which asks her to input a six-digit code that’s just been texted to her own cellphone to verify her identity with that app. (Previous users can just type in their phone number—which serves as their Good2Go username—and password.) Once that level is complete, she returns the phone to its owner, who can view a message explaining the terms of the partner’s consent. (For example, the “Partner is intoxicated but is Good2Go.”) Then, the instigator presses a button marked “Ok,” which reminds him again that yes can be changed to “NO at anytime!”

Then you get to have sex.




Oh wow, can you say romance?  Seriously, leave it to some app developing nerds to take intimacy to the next level.  Feel like you really made a connection with someone, head back to your place, light some candles, fire up the slow jams Spotify playlist, softly kiss as you gently remove each other’s clothes.  Then just as you’re about to lie down betwixt the sheets and make sweet passionate love…take the iPhone off your bedside table and ask her to please indicate her level of sobriety, swipe left, read the consent form, scroll over the fine print, then confirm you are Good2Go.  Oh wait you’re not a member yet, OK hold on, they’re sending you a verification code, check your email then input it here.  Yup just press enter please, hold on the connection is bad in here, wait for the signal to send.  Ok let’s do this, it’s sex time!


Can’t even imagine how awkward that’s gotta be to use this app.   The ultimate mood killer.  By the time you get to the 5th screen requiring a PIN and a 10 topic questionnaire the magic is long gone and it couldn’t be more clear you’re spending another night with your laptop open on your chest and a box of Kleenex.

Oh, and just one little downside, for all those people who care about “privacy” and shit:


When you use the trendy new consent app, Good2Go, you’re theoretically practicing “affirmative consent”: explicit, conscious agreement to sexual activity before it starts.

Incidentally, you’re also telling a new mobile development company with no Internet footprint or track record to speak of (a) who you’re sleeping with, (b) when you did it, and (c) how drunk or sober you were at the time.

According to its small print, Good2Go logs personally identifiable information, including names and phone numbers, on all its users. When two people use the app to hook up, it records both users’ phone numbers, as well as the time and one partner’s sobriety. (Because Good2Go requires you to register with a name and phone number, that number is also tied to your name.) Per its privacy policy, Good2Go can share that information with law enforcement, “third-party service providers” and e-mail marketers — or anyone else, really, “for any reason, in Good2Go’s sole discretion.”

This doesn’t just mean that your data is potentially vulnerable to hackers, should they go after the service. (Good2Go stores its users’ information on Amazon Web Services, which are considered secure — but have been hacked before.) It also means the logs could transfer to another company if Good2Go is sold, be subpoenaed in a lawsuit or criminal case, or sold off to someone else entirely.

[Washington Post]


It can share who you are having sex with with third parties and email marketers!  What a bonus!

11 Thoughts On College Football This Past Weekend
Sep 3010:45AM EST

Last week was an entertaining one in college football, although this upcoming week looks to be the best of the entire season, so let’s get right to it. For the one guy who keeps emailing me from his anonymous email complaining about me covering more than one sport across the network, I want you to know I hear your criticism, and will begin blogging Bieber and Jennifer Lawrence stories immediately.

Brett Hundley

-A few weeks ago I wrote something to the effect of that UCLA has shown flashes of brilliance on offense, defense, and special teams, but haven’t fully put it together yet. Well last week was when it finally started to happen. The Bruins offense was well-paced, putting up a cool 62 points (although 14 of them came on defense and special teams), against a quality Arizona State defense.  We shouldn’t get too high on UCLA though; they still were outgained in total offensive production, gave up 626 yards (looks worse than it was given the pace of play, but still), and were undisciplined in penalties. I still like them as serious Pac-12 contenders, and in the event they finish this season unscathed, remember the direction of the two teams from LA this year; one of them (UCLA), is going to improve every single week while the other (USC), is going to get worse. As long as the shotgun-option keeps humming and the Defense/Special Teams keep their big-play potential to swing the momentum of a game, I like where the trend line is pointing for the boys in Westwood.


-If my offseason prediction that Ole Miss will beat Alabama becomes true, I will make a White House petition that you should be able to bet the outcome of games 1 month before the season. It is my constitutional right as an American to not let Vegas make every moneyline only 5 days before the game! That’s common-man capitalism damnit!


-I hate how AP voters are still protected by anonymity, because I want to ask the majority of them why they still have Florida State as the 1 overall team in the country, besides the fact they don’t want to admit they’re wrong or are lazy. Florida State still hasn’t scratched the surface of what their roster talent suggests they could do, and if God didn’t hate Clemson and Oklahoma State, could easily have two losses right now. They have had 3 close-calls without having faced a top-15 opponent, which does not a #1 team in the nation make. Oklahoma, Auburn, Texas A&M, Alabama, and Oregon have all looked better.


-I hope Steve Spurrier after he retires writes a tell-all biography about his life as a coach. The chapter where he talks about how much he hates the 2014 Gamecocks will be the 2nd most entertaining, right after the one where he belittles Dabo Swinney and Mack Brown like a schoolyard bully.


-If this year’s Notre Dame team played their National Championship Game team, I’d have this year’s incarnation of the Irish favored by 8.5 points. Make no mistake about it; Golson is better than he’s ever been, and the defense looks scary. Their game against Syracuse was one of those disaster games where I oddly felt better about them after it; I feel like I was watching the worst game they were capable of playing, and still never doubted the outcome. Before you start slotting them as a surprise playoff team though, remember that they haven’t played a true road game yet (2 home games, 2 neutral sites) and that Football Outsiders has them as the 16th best team in College Football. The Irish are legit (I’m glad, College Football is more interesting when they are), but they’re not looking like legitimate contenders (yet). Need to see something more from the defense against a great team.


-Oregon is still my #1 team based on results, but if you say Oklahoma I won’t argue it. I want to do a full blog sometime next week when I’m less busy about my thoughts on Oregon as a program, so someone remind me to do that.


-ESPN’s FPI giving Stanford half the chance to win the Pac-12 that they give USC is a perfect representation of the flaw in advanced metrics; they are great at telling you how things ARE and HAVE BEEN, but aren’t necessarily how they WILL BE. Metrics can tell me USC having triple-digit plays against Fresno, beating Stanford, ect. would suggest a high-efficiency offense that stalled against BC, but will most likely win out the conference as it progresses back to the median, whereas Stanford has had a relatively low offensive ceiling. What metrics can’t tell you however, is how USC still has depth issues, sagging morale with their quarterback, and Stanford’s physical brand of football will only become more effective as the season wears teams down.




-Has there ever been a bigger gap between the SEC East and SEC West than there is this year? With no research whatsoever, I’m going to say no. I do not believe a single team in the SEC East would finish in the upper-half of the West after watching Tennessee almost take down Georgia. Everyone in the East can lose to each other any given week, while it seems anyone in the West can beat each other any given week. There’s a difference. (I hope that sentence made sense somewhere outside my head).


-Stealing a point from Pollack: Picture this Georgia team without Gurley. It isn’t pretty. That’s why he deserves the Heisman hands down. As a trailer from a shitty movie once told me, it might be the only argument I have, but it’s the only argument I need.


-Brady Hoke is done. Les Miles won’t leave LSU despite what some Wolverines fans might think, and while Harbaugh is the ideal candidate, I can’t imagine a man of his psychopathic competitiveness will leave the NFL before securing a Lombardi Trophy. If he’s leaving the 49ers (as many reports have suggested is becoming more and more possible), it’s more likely that the next Blue polo he’s wearing has a New York Giants emblem than a Yellow Block M on it.


-Oh yeah, and the Big 10 still sucks, and when I watch them play every week I want to kill myself.


Until next week, @CharlieWisco OUT

Auburn’s T-Shirt Gatling Gun Is Bad Motherfucking Ass
Sep 3010:10AM EST



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Big ass guns and college football…welcome to the South motherfucker.  Seriously all of us little pussy Yankees up here sell our shirts behind counters in comfortable shops or have mascots run around overhand tossing them into the crowd.  Maybe give a cheerleader a little handheld pressurize tube to shoot some lazily into the upper rows.   In Auburn, Alabama they roll out a fucking monster gatling gun and blow your ass away with high velocity merchandise.  Maybe you get a free t-shirt, maybe you get your nose broken by supersonic speed cotton.  50/50 shot and that’s how these southerners like it.   Wouldn’t have it any other way.



PS – Need a Barstool one of these ASAP.  Just shooting Back to Back World War Champs shirts and Hambino tanks and purple starfish socks all over the place.   Have a special extra wide chamber for the new hoodies too.   Talk about a mogul way to move merch.



UGA Student Falsely Accuses Todd Gurley Of Assault After Trying To Take Selfies With Him All Night And Calling Him The N-Word
Sep 309:30AM EST

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AthensUniversity of Georgia running back Todd Gurley was falsely accused of assaulting a man early Sunday in a downtown Athens bar, Athens-Clarke County police said.

The accuser, a 20-year-old UGA student, called police from his home at about 3:18 a.m. to report that he’d been punched by Gurley more than an hour earlier at the Bourbon Street Bar & Grill on Broad Street. He accused the football player of attacking him after he took a photograph of himself with Gurley in the background.

Police said that they reviewed surveillance video footage of the student being punched inside the bar, but it was a white male who struck him, not Gurley.

Gurley told a detective that the UGA student had been trying to take selfies with his cellphone as Gurley was in the background with friends from his hometown. Although Gurley said he did not see the student get punched, he did see some “other guys” pushing him. Gurley told the detective that the student had lost his hat. Gurley said he reached down to pick it up for him when the student approached and directed a racial epithet at Gurley.

It was about then that someone punched the student, according to video footage. The student was kicked out of the bar after the altercation.

When being interviewed in his West Broad Street apartment, police said the student was informed about the video footage that showed him being struck by a white male, not Gurley. The student admitted he’d had been drinking that night, but contended he was not drunk, according to police.





Wait so let me get this story straight.  This kid spent his entire night at the bar trying to sneakily snap himself in a selfie with Todd Gurley (cool guy alert).  Then when he dropped his hat, Gurley picked it up for him and handed it back, to which he responded by saying wow thank you so much.  Wait no, I read that wrong – he called him a n*gger.   This gets him punched in the face by a random white dude and kicked out of the bar, so he goes home and 1 hour later calls the cops to say Gurley assaulted him.  Yeah…guy doesn’t sound like a total scumbag or anything.   What a fucking clown.  Hey dude I don’t know if you noticed but Todd Gurley is kind of a big deal down in Georgia right now?  Like he’s kind of beloved in Athens and a Heisman frontrunner for a 3-1 Dogs team?  Just doesn’t look good for your prospect of ingratiating yourself back into campus life is what I’m saying.




Gurley to the charges…



Barstool U Smokeshow of the Day – Erica from UCF
Sep 309:00AM EST

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Introducing Erica from UCF.  Loooooove Florida girls.


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Kap Slap – Lightning Symphony
Sep 299:00PM EST

Kap Slap hits us with another massive heater, following up his recent edit of Nico & Vinz’s “Am I Wrong” by remixing Cash Cash, Steve Angello, Sandro Silva and Deorro into a hard banging dance floor smash meant for big parties and loud speakers.

Get the free download here and/or stream more from Kap Slap

Barstool U Smokeshow of the Day – Tiffany from Sacramento State
Sep 295:30PM EST

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Introducing Tiffany from Sac State.  Booty booty booty booty rockin everywhere – Bubba Sparxxx.


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