TSG – After getting vanquished in a beer pong match, a group of sore losers opened fire early yesterday at a Texas house party, wounding a female reveler, police report.
The 1:20 AM shooting Sunday took place at a residence in Ames, a city 45 miles from Houston.
According to the Liberty County Sherriff’s Office, investigators are searching for two men who allegedly shot up the party after losing at the beer pong table. Deputies identified the suspects as Decoris “Red” Rucker, 24, and Chris “Crazy Chris” Hackett.
Rucker and Hackett were among a group of five men who became upset after losing a backyard beer pong game. The men, witnesses said, ran from the home while firing wildly at partygoers. An 18-year-old woman was shot in the thigh during the gunfire.
Rucker, Hackett, and the other men fled in a 2006 Buick. Seen at left, Rucker, a convicted felon, has a lengthy rap sheet that includes burglary, assault, weapons, and drug arrests. In April, he was busted on several felony narcotics counts.
This is why you never play beer pong against a guy named “Crazy Chris.” Just has loose cannon written all over him. I mean playing beer pong at a party with the usual cast of characters and beer pong hardos that you’ll encounter is bad enough. The guys who will debate you for 20 minutes before the game even starts about how it’s technically beirut that you’re playing, not beer pong. Guys who will spend the whole time making snarky comments about how they think you’re leaning and saying “is there even any beer in that cup?” every single time one of his shots rims out. Who will snap over the top of the cup before every shot to distract you and do an entire free throw routine before each shot like he’s at the line shooting 2 to decide the NBA finals. Plenty of annoyances like that you have to deal with at a normal house party without worrying about Crazy Chris and his felon friend Red Rucker losing the game and immediately spraying the living room down with gunfire.
Honestly at this point it just might be a good idea to avoid beer pong altogether at social functions? Yeah it sucks losing in OT after they hit a rebuttal with a list a mile long so you’re never going to sniff the table again and have to sulk on the couch with a solo cup 1/4 full of warm beer full of ping pong ball bacteria. But, not as bad as pulling out a win and taking a bullet to the gut. So think about it.
PS – One of the first things we ever did with Barstool New York was have me, KFC and Jenna Marbles go to AC to play in the World Series of Beer Pong. I’d say 85-90% of the crowd there has at some point fired a weapon at someone over a beer pong dispute. Thought it was just gonna be a big bro fest with everyone partying and drinking and having a good time. Instead there were like dudes in headbands analyzing cell phone footage of other teams setting up scouting reports designing strategy based on the direction of the AC blowing in the room. Long story short we were kicked out 20 minutes in.